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It has been a day when i spent most of it thinking about the past. Specifically, when i was studying in secondary school. I thought of that someone whom i had a crush on for the longest of time.

It's weird to be thinking of her all of a sudden, i know. Perhaps it has something to do with the bunch of photos flooding my Facebook feed about a couple from the same secondary school getting married.

They had a wonderful story to. The gentleman actually got rejected a few times...but he persevered and eventually got together. They maintained the relationship through thick and thin for a period of about 10 years and finally communed this day. It was magnificent.

Unfortunately, not everyone can achieved what they want no matter. Some things just can't be no matter how much effort you put in. You can feel despair, cry and scream all you want but the world is going to move on not giving a damn to how you feel.

The hardest thing for me with regards to that lady was deciding whether to move on or not. It was never a question i asked myself. I had conviction in maintaining that dedication towards her that i kept myself single throughout the early part of my teenage life. But when i found out she got attached, the grief and injustice i felt was so heavy for me to bear that, i just straight up volunteer for an overseas mission and left for 3 months. Yeah, that happened when i was in the army.

When i was there, my mind was open and i did not try to reject doing anything. In fact, i tried everything i could. I got a lot of experience doing almost everything from planning finances to replacing a flat tire to going to a strip club. I felt i was over.

Although i have gotten over her...you know, she will always have that special place in my mind...even when i am pursuing some other great lady. I sometimes wonder if, this means i can fully commit myself to her...but i guess i can only go along and see how it goes.

Pardon my brief reminiscing.

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