As promised, here is my post for the last day of 2009. Let's start with the serious business first, the review of this year for me.
2009 is a rather major year for me, as i'm taking all of the remaining A level papers. Yet i did not choose to have a good start. I started the year being really...lazy and somewhat irresponsible. I skipped school several times for no apparent reason...maybe just to game, but it's not reason enough. Eventually i snapped out of that phase and stay focused after Term 1.
Then came the mid-year prelim examinations, which i don't give heck and continued my gaming spree despite the exams going on. Hence, there is no surprise i got results that became my worst performance ever. For the first time since 2 years ago, my name was removed from the ranking board. To make things worst, it's people i felt that they cannot make it, makes it to the board. I felt really threatened and maybe, just maybe, a little scared. Unlike what i looked on the surface, i actually give things much thought and worry for them. From that point, i started my fight. I started to fight with all of my strength.
...and the end-year prelim exam shows it. That with work, i can make it. I managed to pull myself from unranked, to the 3rd of the school.
With the same spirit, i fought on for my A levels. Sure, i wasn't as confident, but i tried my best. I've exhausted every minute doing what i can for it. I know what i will get for the minimum, so to be honest, i'm not too worried for it.
Now, it's been a month since that is over. I'm actively looking for a job to kill the time. It's funny to remember the fact how i don't want to do the same when i finished my O levels. I was still kind of scared to face the reality of society, or so they say. Yet, it is after 3 years in a school i dislike, that i feel that i have matured enough to snap out of it.
Everyone has a childhood. Someday, everyone will get out of it.
---
Feelings-wise, you know, as in "GIRLS" to spell it out loud for people who don't know me enough to know it. I have moved on. I have let go. Yet, it is an undeniable fact that she is a part of me i can never let go. While i walk on my path to the future, if, a really big, fat and unlikely IF, she ever called out to me...i'll just run back to the spot where i always wait for her.
Else i'll just stay single. Don't misunderstand me as "That's waiting for her" or "You're abnormal (Spell 'Gay' for someone)". It's true that in some sense I've kind of lost interest in trying to look for one, but you know, when you get attached, you need a lot of responsibility, time and sacrifice to maintain the relationship. I've seen too many failed relationship because of these things, and i am determined not to get into the same mistakes as those people. To note, i'm not looking for any short-term satisfaction or anything of that sort, i'm looking for someone who can stand by me, and let me stand by her, for a long time.
...but, to quote my accounting teacher, Mr. T, it is just best to stay single! You keep your money to yourself, and you get to spent 100% of it. Haha!
---
On second thought, i decided not to write my resolutions for next year in this same post. I'd do it tomorrow, in a New Year's post.
I'll see you tomorrow.
2009 is a rather major year for me, as i'm taking all of the remaining A level papers. Yet i did not choose to have a good start. I started the year being really...lazy and somewhat irresponsible. I skipped school several times for no apparent reason...maybe just to game, but it's not reason enough. Eventually i snapped out of that phase and stay focused after Term 1.
Then came the mid-year prelim examinations, which i don't give heck and continued my gaming spree despite the exams going on. Hence, there is no surprise i got results that became my worst performance ever. For the first time since 2 years ago, my name was removed from the ranking board. To make things worst, it's people i felt that they cannot make it, makes it to the board. I felt really threatened and maybe, just maybe, a little scared. Unlike what i looked on the surface, i actually give things much thought and worry for them. From that point, i started my fight. I started to fight with all of my strength.
...and the end-year prelim exam shows it. That with work, i can make it. I managed to pull myself from unranked, to the 3rd of the school.
With the same spirit, i fought on for my A levels. Sure, i wasn't as confident, but i tried my best. I've exhausted every minute doing what i can for it. I know what i will get for the minimum, so to be honest, i'm not too worried for it.
Now, it's been a month since that is over. I'm actively looking for a job to kill the time. It's funny to remember the fact how i don't want to do the same when i finished my O levels. I was still kind of scared to face the reality of society, or so they say. Yet, it is after 3 years in a school i dislike, that i feel that i have matured enough to snap out of it.
Everyone has a childhood. Someday, everyone will get out of it.
---
Feelings-wise, you know, as in "GIRLS" to spell it out loud for people who don't know me enough to know it. I have moved on. I have let go. Yet, it is an undeniable fact that she is a part of me i can never let go. While i walk on my path to the future, if, a really big, fat and unlikely IF, she ever called out to me...i'll just run back to the spot where i always wait for her.
Else i'll just stay single. Don't misunderstand me as "That's waiting for her" or "You're abnormal (Spell 'Gay' for someone)". It's true that in some sense I've kind of lost interest in trying to look for one, but you know, when you get attached, you need a lot of responsibility, time and sacrifice to maintain the relationship. I've seen too many failed relationship because of these things, and i am determined not to get into the same mistakes as those people. To note, i'm not looking for any short-term satisfaction or anything of that sort, i'm looking for someone who can stand by me, and let me stand by her, for a long time.
...but, to quote my accounting teacher, Mr. T, it is just best to stay single! You keep your money to yourself, and you get to spent 100% of it. Haha!
---
On second thought, i decided not to write my resolutions for next year in this same post. I'd do it tomorrow, in a New Year's post.
I'll see you tomorrow.
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