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A week had passed, just like that.

Time seems to flow with no hesitations, every minute and second just passed by us with no notice. I'd think that in the flash of the eye, 7 months would be gone and the final battle would begin. Yet i still felt nothing...i still felt empty and that i'm not doing enough.

I am really tired of this daily routine, the endless target-setting, and useless self-reflection. Everytime i'm being reminded that i'm not doing enough, i just forget about it quick. I wanted to change, i really do. But how? One headbutt to the wall and i just run backwards into my hiding hole. Can this be called trying?

The worst thing is, i'm actually spending significant amount of time evaluating my emotional progress. Is this what they call depression? Heck, no one should really give a damn unless i want to die. Wait a minute, they shouldn't care if if i wanted to.

"I'm so damned tired of this bloody waiting game, and one that might even have a reward."

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